Today, Lucas and I are supposed to travel north to Portland for the wedding of some good friends. The wedding is early enough tomorrow that we need to leave today to be able to be there.....
The snow is relentless: Winter weather warnings. Chains required on Interstate 5. Snow pack and ice on the roads. Horrible visibility. High winds north of here. 10-20 inches of expected snowfall today. The worst storm to hit the area in the past couple of months happens to arrive on the day that we need to travel north. It is gnarly out there.
I look at the images online from the Interstate webcams and am discouraged. I look across the valley from my kitchen window to the Interstate and see the semi's either pulled to the side of the highway or creeping at a slow 5-10 mph. It is not looking good. The summits we would need to travel over north of here are some 2000 feet higher than our current elevation. It is typically worse weather in those areas.
So, I am feeling frustrated and disappointed. I so want to be there for my friend's celebration and ceremony!! They are important people to me. I was so looking forward to spending more time with my other good friends of Portland. I was excited to retrieve even more of my belongings that remain in storage: books, pottery tools, even my cloth napkins.
Today, I am feeling so completely done with winter. I really didn't sign up for this. My expectations of what the weather would be like at this time of year here were based on historical data, averages that are not an accurate basis for establishing reliable predictions. A year ago today, it was 69 degrees and sunny with a low of 42 at night. Today, there is a forecasted high of 31 and 100% chance of precipitation all day.
These are lessons to me to not have expectations and attachments. To learn to let go and be open to what is. Right now, that feels hard to do. As the snowfall gets heavier and heavier, I see that I may need to accept this reality, curl up in a blanket on the couch and knit all day.
Life doesn't always turn out the way we want or expect it to. When this happens we ARE living in the mystery. We surrender our attachments, accept the present moment, and keep moving forward from this adjusted perspective.